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11 Jan 2012

Seizing some Basket Time



I wrote about the Chore Wars article from time magazine before. This time I wanted to touch on free or leisure time. Here is a quote from the article
       " how women are spending their free time, which is increasingly devoted to a blend of child care and leisure activities," says Sayer, who notes that this leads to leisure's being "contaminated" by less pleasurable activities or "fragmented" by interruptions — when you're reading on the couch, say, and get called away every 15 minutes to referee a squabble or find a missing Lego piece or administer a snack"
            -Ruth Davis Konigsberg

I know that I would have to consider my free time 'contaminated' for sure. I have written before about how I will sit down with a book and tell the kids not to bother me for 15 minutes but all parents know that is a dream on some days.

We have all read the articles that tell us how we need to take time for ourselves - some non mommy time. But as a working parent I feel guilty when I take some time to myself out of the home and am spending even more time away from my kids. I haven't swallowed the idea of a happy mommy makes for happy children yet.

I go out by myself or with friends very infrequently and only when I can work it around my days off work- I would never extend my work day to meet friends for dinner.
I can count on one hand how many times my husband and I have gone out without the kids for date night and we have been together for 12 years! Beyond organizing the time and paying for a babysitter we often can't figure out what to do together- this doesn't bode well for empty nest syndrome does it?

What do you do to ensure your have some quality time without your children?
Do you have a regular night out?
Do you experience any guilt about taking this time for yourself but also time away from your children.

Anyone want to join me to take back our free time?
 Time to go to the library-read-shop-exercise-watch a movie-eat a meal-visit friends-take a class-get a massage. We can call it
  as in filling the apple basket or not becoming a crazy basket case.

We will make a regular date with ourselves, of course we don't have to be by ourselves but just doing something that doesn't involve our children. 'Regular' can mean anything you want- it can be daily, weekly or monthly.

Take  this pledge for yourself and then come back and tell me what you have done to take back your free time. Lets inspire each other to have a little basket time.

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